Saturday, August 14, 2010
2day was zone games day, epic ttm, caz our group play scoop ball and the scoop is just like freakin sick so yea... i just i was too focused on something else (the scoop) to actually focus on the game, so it was just -.- and i didnt even manage to touch the ball. wow... this remins me of the chat yesterday...
although it was quite a short chat, it still lingers in my mind... her every single word, how she told us everything and how she was very positive on everything, trying to lead us to the right path, being a good jnco squad. and this makes me think how life is unfair, crude and just plain screwed.....Quoted:"But to experience this difference, first. BELIEVE IN YOURSELF." i just find that hard, it likely impossible, i feel a constrain to do such a thing, overcome such a fear... i dunno how to achieve it, im lost and im trying to cope through...let me go, let me be free.. the arrow goes forward atfer pulling it backwards, the bullet goes forward after pulling the trigger back. everyone will get happy only after facing difficulties in their lifes, but why is it that i am afraid to push forward and bravely face the difficulties ahead? maybe its just because i feel that no one is supporting me for whatever i do in life, everything i do, there is only one person who will agree with it and even try to give suggestions to improve it, saying it suxs when it does and saying it roxs when it does. Those are the people i need to have, i need you....dun leave me. you are srsly the one who cares for me, who bothers to even respond to my need of help, who even bothers to do something to help me, 'counsel' me and everything you do. you rox ttm, stay close by me, i shall treasure u, holding tight and never letting go...
DAY 5- Your dreams ._. when i saw this, i was thinking about the dreams at night those kind, but i short term memory loss, so when i wake up i forget about it... but i realised its talking about the dreams you are trying to pursue, the goals you want to reach... lets just say, in secondary school, i thought i have lost everything in my life, everything is screwed that even i do not have a clear vision of the future i want to have, maybe its cause i never wanted to take the effort to reach out my hand and try to catch those dreams, maybe they are just lost in mid-air and i just cannot find them. they are far away, i am far away from reality. i just dont want my dreams to be nowhere, i need my sense of direction, sometimes even when we are on the right track, we will just get run over if we just sit there. i want to pursue them, i want to make them true. im just too afraid to take that step... it might seem small, but quite big for me. im just too scared, too afraid to do it. why? i dunno why too... its just a feeling i get. Dare to dream, dare to fly, dare to be the ever chosen one to touch the sky. pls come back (:
- 2day is the day, finally after thick and thin, no matter what, i will be cheering you all the way (:
