how hard is it to stop your heart from loving? As much as hard to stop your eyes from blinking... caz the more i control my tears, the more hurt i get, but yeah why does everything like this have to happen to my friends... im sorry if i have not been a good friend... im sorry if i have not done a good job... i just cant do much... i know im useless, but everything's going to be alright ok... im sorry... i cant do much for you... i dunno how to handle D: but just chill ok ._. pls D: dun make me so scared and worried ok ._. im damn scared now D: dun ok ._. im guess im just not that friend for you... i guess im just not fitted to be your friend.. and i guess you find me irritating now.. im sorry... i just you would lead your life better off without me... yeah, i just i'll just have to leave, i guess you have better friends, better seniors, that can care for you better than me, to teach you so you would ace, to comfort you so you wont emo.. but i guess im useless.. im sorry... im just not fitted to be with you, im just not fitted to be in your life... im sorry for ruining your life... im sorry...

but yeah... i dunno lar... i just cant seem to be myself when im around you, no one listens to me...i get daoed all the time... i emo and i dont tell anyone, and cry silently, but yet i guess you still find out in the end... i dunno lar... i just dont feel right these few days... i just dont feel myself... i guess, the people around me srsly affect me a lot.. i thought i was okay, but yeah, now i feel emo.... sorry lar, but yeah im getting affected, but i guess im not sleeping so early, reasons... but yeah... im not fitted to be a human i guess, no wonder i was nvr treated like one.. im just not fitted to be a friend, caz i dont know how to be one... i try to help, yet i disappoint the person even more... but yeah, i nvr seem to be helping, but yet im like making things worse, im just not fitted to stay on earth... leave, without a trace, without any memories left behind... but yeah, everything is different now... why are you becoming like this D:, what have i done to you D: im so sorry D: please dont change just because im fcuked up and you cant adapt ._. im sorry for being so fcuked up... i'll not leave a trail, i'll not leave any memories.. i'll pack up everything and just leave... memories would leave tears, tears would leave sadness... i'll take all of this away... so at least you wouldnt not have to keep them... i'll just leave,i'll just die.. theres no turning back anymore... facing reality hurts and yeah, are my actions even worth it... nothing seems to be doing and i cant seem to continue on anymore... caz nothing is worth it anymore, i cant face reailty like this anymore... im breaking down... im dying... sry...